Friday, March 30, 2012

Half a Billionaire?

My husband has assured me that we will most definitely be the lucky recipients of the big Mega Millions $540 million jackpot today.  Joe's plans for any big lottery win have always been the same.  He wants a cottage in Michigan and a couple of jet skis.  He wants to retire from working 7 days a week and go golfing.  He also has his eye on Nicole Kidman.

In addition, Joe also wants to pay off the mortgages of all his friends and family.  Considering his extensive network of "people," that gesture alone would pretty much deplete the entire half billion.  The guy knows everyone.

My plans are a bit different.  I would like to start shopping the Eddie Bauer in-season stuff instead of the clearance rack.  I would also alter my plans for a discounted third-world tummy tuck and opt to have the surgery right here in the good old US of A.  I've also got my eye on Orlando Bloom.

I like planning for our big win.  It's fun to fantasize about a life of complete ease and luxury.  Instead of saving for reasonable state schools, I would start researching the Ivy League.  I'd add cello lessons.  There would be an in-house cook who could make healthy meals my children would actually eat.

But never fear, loyal reader.  After tonight's win, I will have a host of new topics about which to blog.  Celebrity run-ins.  My hunky new pool boy.  The new Apple Computer.

This is going to be fun. 

Yet somehow, I can't shake the feeling that I am still going to be responsible for all the laundry.


  1. oh Marianne... the housekeeper is a required hire. You may even need 2!!! You may also need to hire a chauffeur... you can still be in the car to take the kids to school, but probably shouldn't be driving since mimosa's will be a staple for your breakfast!! OH, and if you wouldn't mind sending the driver over to pick me up so I can join you, that would be great!!

  2. He. He. Joe and Dave are the eternal optimists! You should see what's piled in front of my basement door. Thank goodness urine doesn't stain!

  3. I'm just hoping that if I win, Meg Ryan will take an interest in me.

    About that "pool boy" job. I'm available. I go by the credo, "I'll do anything for a buck".

  4. Oh, I was kinda hoping to win. I'm not sure what I would do with that kinda cash, but I could see a few maids in my future.

  5. If you could send me a couple hundred just to get us through the weekend at Disney that would be great. Mmmmkay? Thanks.

  6. I agree, you do need cello lessons. I think the place where I got my violin is somewhat close to you, not sure as that was decades ago. ...checking... Yes, Ann Arbor, Michigan, Shar Instruments.

  7. I cannot wait to hear all about the future celebrity run-in's!

    And just out of curiosity, when hubby says he wants Nicole Kidman, does he want THE Nicole Kidman, or just want you to have surgery so you look like her? and I guess you can predict Part II of this question: do you want the REAL Orlando Bloom, or do you want hubs to have surgery to look like him? and if you want the REAL one, then is hubby like a back-up? (If yes, I like your style.)

    please remember me when you are rich

  8. I didn't know Nicole Kidman was for sale. If your husband ever gets her, he can send her husband my way. =)

  9. Could you also get a big old tour bus to visit your blog followers in!?

  10. Wait. You've been silent since the drawing ...

    Could this mean you won? And you're currently busy acquiring Orlando Bloom as your own personal hunky pool boy ...?



  11. I was hoping to win, pay off my friends' mortgages and get the top shelf lipo. If you aren't as social you could have both. Alas, we didn't win.