Being a Chicago Bears' Superfan in possession of one Brian Urlacher signed football, I am still somewhat annoyed that my team hasn't delivered since 1985.
|It lives right in my closet, next to my favorite pair of sparkly heels.|
It has been 103 years since the Cubs last won a World Series, yet they always manage to plaster some unsuspecting great-great-grandma on the front page. She might not know her own name, but still smiles dizzily for the cameras. She desperately clutches a blue pennant placed in her hand, obviously confusing it with her latest IV fluid drip.
Which leads me back to this Sunday. In lieu of having a Chicago team to root for, I'm torn between the New York Giants and the New England Patriots. Great...East Coast Teams. Like we don't already have a complex about them here in the Midwest. Second City indeed.
Always a freaking bridesmaid.
While my husband chose his Super Bowl team based on skill, existing Fantasy Football loyalties, and coaches, I have a far more subjective approach:
- That rotten Tom Brady (smoking hot as he may be), dumped his aging, pregnant actress girlfriend for a supermodel. In the world of saggy-stomached middle-aged women, that kind of transgression is unforgivable. Advantage: Giants
- My husband's baby brother is a high school buddy of a Giants' pro-bowler. When I signed the boys up for Brother Rice's sports camp last summer, I met the player's mom who works in the office. She was super nice and gave my kids suckers. I can be bought with suckers. Advantage: Giants
- Two words: New York. I lived there for a bit. I still have friends all over the boroughs. A Giants' victory would make my pals happy, and perhaps they'd even plan a visit to see their old pal here in Chicago to celebrate. Advantage: Giants
- You just know that poor Eli Manning has suffered his whole life from little brother complex. I relate. Marcia, Marcia, Marcia (click for reminder). I was so Jan. Go Eli! Advantage: Giants
Now if I could just talk my husband into letting me wear my Snuggie for the big event, all would be perfect. That, and my fuzzy pink princess slippers. Talk about living.