Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Oh Fudge

Post-It reminders have taken over my computer.  There is a perfect storm of events, commitments, and projects requiring completion over the next 90 hours. Normally, I would relax over a frothy beverage and decompress as this kind of stress-storm makes landfall.

But now? 

There is no time.

And I think I'm going to need a bigger boat.  Er blog.

I'm choosing to man-up.  This will not be a boring recap of stupid silly things that most people would roll their eyes at and say "You call those problems?  You got nothin' lady...quit your bitchin."

Instead, I am allowing myself only one really long, run-on sentence accompanied by the systematic plucking out of every last strand of hair from my head:

Oh sh*t I hafta pick out a reading for Wednesday's book-signing, get gluten-free food for wonderful doctor-friend coming to town who I think I should re-name "celiac-friend" but she might kill me, rehearse saying "penis" 152 times for LTYM audition, make Jack practice his piano for poor dead grandma's memorial service on Saturday, write something sensical for Chicago Parent column and blog, send out a bunch of 2nd edition Epic Mom books to reviewers who requested them, and lastly.....

GO PEE.

I've been holding it for 9 hours.

I also can't remember where I put my kids.

My kids have some stuff going on, too, but their Post-It note reminders have been obliterated by my newer and bigger Post-It note reminders.

I really hope there aren't Parent-Teacher conferences this week.

And how did people survive before Post-It note reminders?

Anyway, this is where having blog friends ROCKS.  They fill in the gaps when my brain takes a sabbatical.

Andrea from Maybe it's Just Me is giving away one of the FINAL remaining first edition copies of Epic Mom.  Go over there right now to enter! Andrea has also been singing Journey songs to me for a week straight, so I really need you guys to keep her occupied while I get the rest of this crap done.  I can't get "Don't Stop Believin'" out of my head because of Andrea.

Sh*t...that reminds me.  I, too, have to start my book giveaway.  Someone add that to the list.

Another brilliant blogger, Gossip Girl over at ~*~Whatever~*~, graciously allowed me to ramble on about goopy babies and how much I hate the A-Z challenge recently. I was thrilled when she invited me to appear on her blog, but given my answers, I'm not 100% sure she's still talking to me.

So won't you go have a look-see at my nice blog friends while I google "How Not to Kill My Celiac Friend via Poor Menu Choices?"

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(As a general matter of perspective, I know things are not BAD, just busy.  I try always to remember poor Oscar below and his plight to escape a cursed, funneled life):

I have an inordinate amount of love for this picture.  Oscar the Funneled Dog belongs to my friend, Robyn.  I have 300 different post ideas bouncing around in my head about Oscar, but I keep getting side-tracked.  I promise to write about Oscar eventually, but in the meantime, let's pour on the love.  You know...like through a funnel.

32 comments:

  1. How about Bon Jovi? Goin' doooowwn...in a blaze of glo-ree.

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    1. And now there are two of you....

      But I'm still laughing!

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  2. We unadmitted hoarders of all things paper are out of control!!!! I hear you!

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  3. Actually Marianne, your kids are fine. Ummm....the reason you can't find them is you're mistakenly in your neighbor's home and they want their computer back. No worries really, I walk into my neighbor's homes by mistake all the time. They don't mind really unless I come in dressed in my Zorro costume. Then they seem standoffish....I mean really doesn't everyone have a Zorro costume?

    MBF

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    1. I have a Zorro one and the Lone Ranger. Tell me that's normal.

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  4. Breathe lady, and Pinterest some gluten-free recipes. You are going to be AWESOME! BTW: I'm auditioning for the Indy LTYM show, but I don't have to say penis at all in my piece. I do use the word junk in reference to private parts though, but only once.

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    1. I have a feeling if I ever Pinterested, the world would never see me aagain. GOOD LUCK on the Indy LTYM show - can't wait to hear how it goes!!

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  5. Slow down and breathe just a bit; I got tired just reading all you have to do and have done. Just relax, it will get all done, though you may want to think about cloning yourself.....

    Now I know why you aren't fond of A/Z. I like it to meet other bloggers and to have a crazy April :)

    I definitely would love if we could lose 15 pounds this year through blogging :)

    betty

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    Replies
    1. I survived! Breathing apparently does help. And assists in sustaining life. Who knew?

      Thanks, Betty!

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  6. YOU GO GIRL!!!!
    No, really, You go girl.....Go Pee already!

    That is all I have to say ;)

    Oh, and at least you don't have to wear a funnel around your head. Did that help? NO?
    Sorry :(

    In all seriousness. You Rock! Stay strong, and I am sure the kids will show up soon.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, J.R. The lil jerkies showed up and ate the leftover cookies. Ah well, the signing was so worth it.

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  7. Dog funnels are excellent places to keep post it notes!

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  8. Marianne, Marianne...Breathe and do what you can.
    Consider it a blessing that you can't find the kids and go pee while you have the chance.

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    Replies
    1. I just finished peeing now. Whew. That was a doozie.

      Thanks, Tina!

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  9. Just keep those balls juggling in the air and make time for a frosty beverage or two. It will all get done. When you take time out, hop over to my blog for a bit of a reminder to take care of yourself and a vid clip of a woman who reminds us all of what we deal with everyday.

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    1. With a history of heart disease in my family, I thank you for the important and timely reminder, Sandbox.

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  10. Um, excuse me, but just to be fair...I have sung more REO Speedwagon than Journey. Yes, THAT makes it sooooo much better, no? If not, then...where it began, I can't begin to knowing, but then I know it's growing strong.........sweet Marianne....bum bum bum.......(ok, I'll leave now)

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  11. Just wanted to say good luck for Wednesday and hope that it all goes well. xx

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  12. Marianne....seriously, good luck tomorrow. What a great accomplishment.

    MBF

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    1. Thank you, MBF & loving the new blog!

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  13. Good luck today!! But seriously, why hasnt anyone commented on how cute my Oscar is??? Doesn't anyone have a heart?

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    1. Oscar is adorable and is handling the humiliation of the dreaded cone far better than our pathetic pup does.

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    2. Andrea is always here to support the dog lovers of the world and their poor unfortunate funnel-wearers.

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  14. Wow, LTYM sounds awesome! What a cool thing to be a part of.

    February is trying to kill me as well. See in you March, once we've survived. WE WILL SURVIVE.

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    1. March? It's a date. Thanks, Vesuvius!

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  15. That run-on sentence exhausted me. If it weren't for post it notes I probably wouldn't even remember to wake up and get out of bed every morning. I hope you get a few moments of down time soon.

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