Saturday, January 5, 2013

Someone I Adore

As part of the blogging world, it is natural to seek out writers who are a bit like yourself.  My favorites tend to lean towards the irreverent, absurd, and funny.

And then there are certain posts that make me run like hell.  I call them the "String-'em-up-by-their-toes" posts.    A sampling:

Dear World:

The other day, a stranger/family member/total idiot said something very insensitive about me/my child/my life choices.  I think this person should cease to exist or take a year-long class on how to be better human being.

Signed,

Someone Who Has Never Said Anything Stupid in Her Entire Life

Then the comments from the angry brigade come rolling in:

"I would have hit her in the nose!"

"Did you call the police?"

"You should think about contacting her boss and report on what a colossal, insensitive, self-serving cad she is!"

These posts always make me sad and a little scared.  Mostly because I say the wrong things at all the wrong times.  I try not to.  But sometimes I just get flustered and nervous by an unexpected admission, and my mouth outflanks my brain. I really don't want the world to string me up by my toes because I suffer from the worst case of foot-in-mouth disease EVER.

Needless to say, I shy away from bloggers whom I know I would offend due to my inability to read from the sanctioned script.

And then I found Kat over at No Holding Back.  Kat blogs about motherhood and shares her experience on losing a child to Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome. 

Now anyone who has ever met me is shaking her head furiously and muttering "no, Marianne, NO." A mother who has faced one of the most horrendous things possible certainly does not need my kind of stupidity in her life, right?

Yet Kat also is one of those amazing people who can step away from her own pain and realize that the world is filled with crazy, nervous, stupid people.  And she doesn't force anyone to go to sensitivity training. She doesn't devote her blog to calling them out.  She simply tells her story and sometimes, stupid crazy people actually learn.  We learn from her wonderful writing and experiences, and not from a lecture and a dozen comments from the world of pitch-fork carrying angry bloggers.

I love Kat.  I think everyone should check her out.  Particularly this post, aptly named Awkward.

Thank you, Kat, for educating in a way that doesn't make me feel like the biggest dum-dum ever.  You are a gem.

26 comments:

  1. Ooooh, I can't wait to meet her!

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  2. I visited her; I truly get what she said. I too am awkward, but I think the world needs awkward people right?

    (starting your book this weekend :)

    betty

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    1. I like awkward people. You can't trust those overly-smooth people. I always think they're hiding something. (;

      Thank you again for supporting the book! I love you!

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    1. I don't think you'll regret it, DeBie!

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    1. Thanks and thanks! (; (I don't think I do that smiley face thing right...are mine facing the wrong way?)

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  5. I agree, I hate feeling like I have to be careful all the time, because I definitely have doozies that come out of my mouth! And I hope I'm never a person that gets easily offended.

    I'll go check her out, now :)

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    1. Thanks, Kianwi! I know I'm sensitive, so I always tell myself to choose "the best" way to take things instead of opting for the most offensive. It has definitely helped (and reminds me what an idiot I can be a lot of the time).

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  6. I love that you follow Kat, Marianne, and I think you say appropriate comments and know when to be funny and with whom to be funny and when to just be there. This is a lovely post by you and by Kat.

    We all have our awkward moments and we all make blunders--part of being human. And then we have the nerve to think that our kids shouldn't make mistakes! Haven't we trained them not to!

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    1. Thanks, Carol. I try to gauge people before commenting, but I know I miss the mark sometimes. Thankfully, most people are pretty forgiving (or have written me off as a tad askew).

      Wait. My kids can't be perfect? Crap. I'll let 'em out of the dungeon now. (;

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  7. Crazy, nervous, stupid people...it's like you were talking about me.

    Kat sounds amazing. I am off to check her out.

    Just want to say I was sort of scared when I saw my picture on your blog. Also, I am so jealous of how gorgeous you are in that picture from your Kicking Corners interview. I loved that interview! Especially the part where you talked about not waiting around for some magic discovery to take place. That if you want to get noticed you have to submit your writing. I can't think of better advice!

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    1. See, Lillian? This is why you need to give up the dome and move here. We'd totally get along.

      I hope you take my super-genius advice and write more fiction. I LOVED your piece the other day, and think you need to get on it (you know, in between raising your daughter, painting, and tending to the dome & pirate-husband).

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  8. So my email kept buzzing and I noticed it was comments on my blog... strange, I don't usually get a ton of comments. I start reading and several of them start off or include "Marianne loves you and now I love you too!" I came over to your blog to see what was happening, thinking that maybe you put together a listing of blogs you like and found a whole post about me and my blog. And it made me cry! This is one of the nicest things anyone has done for me/said about me in a long while, and I just want you to know how much you lifted me up today, on a day I'm fighting a migraine and just feeling a bit blue. Thanks for adoring me. I adore you too!!

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    1. Kat - I was honored to do it! I am always so humbled by people who have faced great adversity who still have compassion and forgiveness for those who don't always "get it." I love your blog - all of it. The sad, the funny, & the silly. I'd share some of my Excedrin Migraine if I could. Hope you're feeling better soon & thank you for tolerating the crazy, stupid, nervous people of the world.

      Love, Captain of the Crazy, Stupid, Nervous Society

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    2. I will be your first mate!!!

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  9. I discovered Kat and her blog recently when she joined our online blogging group...you are right, her blog and her writing is great! When she saw that she was mentioned here today, the first thing she did was tell the rest of us to come check you out. Now that's one classy blogger...glad to have discovered you too now!

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    1. Classy doesn't even begin to describe it, right? I love her so. Thank you for popping in! I love visitors (mostly because people run the other way when they see me coming).

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  10. I've only recently "met" Kat and I have to agree, she is wonderful and everything you've said about her is right on. She is a pleasure to follow and read. The world is a better place with her in it!

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    1. Thank you for stopping in! I wish Kat's wisdom and non-judgemental ways were contagious. I myself could use some of that. The world is indeed a better place with her in it!

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  11. I've just met Kat too (she joined our Bloppy Bloggers group on Facebook) and I've found her to be a lovely person!! You must be too! :)

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    1. She is fantastic. I don't know about me....I'm trying to catch Kat's brand of goodness. Here's hoping! Thank you for coming by!

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  12. Also just recently met Kat from our blogging group and can totally agree with you. She is totally genuine and one of kind. I truly enjoy reading her blog and also just happy to have gotten to know her a bit better in this crazy world!! Thanks for sharing this here and couldn't agree with you more!!

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  13. I am so blushing!!!!! Wow. I mean wow. I think my love language is definitely words of affirmation! I feel loved!!!!

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  14. "It's ok though cause I drink a lot."

    AWWWWWWWWWWW yeah!

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