Remember that scene in Superman I when Lex Luthor manufactures a giant earthquake along the San Andres' Fault to increase the value of his real estate? Poor Lois Lane races along in her 1970's gas guzzler trying to outrun the giant dirty crack that ends up swallowing her whole. Well, the producers could have used my driveway to create that scene.
I hate my driveway. The only person who hates my driveway more than me is my husband. He goes to battle with it every winter when he shovels mountains of snow and is completely unable to finish a single smooth shoveling motion. The shovel and blower always get stuck in the cracks.
Now that the snow has melted and the kids are anxious to play outside, these massive cracks have become serious impediments to a smooth ride down the driveway on bikes and scooters. My little wheel-bound boys hit these cracks and have a Superman flight moment all of their own.
My next door neighbors decided to rub the proverbial salt in the wound by installing a beautiful brand-new concrete driveway this week. It is absolutely breathtaking. My kids have been watching with devoted fascination wondering if and when our driveway will know such love.
While we have been saving for this purchase, I am suddenly finding it hard to pull the trigger on the expenditure. Thousands of dollars on a driveway. A driveway. It's not like a vacation or a new car. People spit on driveways. Oil leaks on driveways. I let the kids write with chalk all over the driveway. Which led me to a brilliant new fundraising scheme to pay for the driveway:
If anyone is interested, please feel free to contact me at email@example.com. Monthly rates are available. No rain guarantees.